Bank Holiday Blues

So, it’s another Bank holiday weekend, the last one of this month but one of many!

For some, this weekend will be welcomed with open arms, beautiful plans will have been made, excitement will be brewing, and the sun is shining which often makes for smiles all around.

BUT

Bank holidays don’t instil that same excitement for all, for some, it can be a time of unwanted emotions, painful family dynamics, turbulent relationships, and loneliness.

Perhaps this bank holiday is serving as a reminder of those difficult family dynamics that have been going on for so long, maybe for you, a bank holiday means seeing family members you haven’t seen in a long time, and this stirs up uncomfortable feelings for you.

Or whenever the sun shines, you’re secretly filled with anxiety because you know you’re going to spend a huge chunk of time analysing what to wear so you can feel comfortable now more of your body is suddenly expected to be on display.

Or maybe you’re a co-parent and this bank holiday will be a lonely time because this weekend your children are away from you and that’s really hard for you to accept because how can you have a good time when your babies aren’t there? Even though you’re desperately in need of a break and absolutely deserve it!

If any of the above sounds a bit like you, keep reading because I’ve got some tips to help you through this weekend.

·  Set clear boundaries and stick to them.

·  Remind yourself that your needs are important!

· Communicate what you’re not comfortable talking about and be willing to remind people “I’m not ok to talk about this” or “I’m not comfortable answering these questions” if they overstep your boundary.

· Be willing to walk away and let yourself know that it’s ok to do this.

· If you’re going to a social gathering, you’re feeling anxious about and it’s possible, take a friend (or someone you’re comfortable with) with you.

· Try to value the rest and free time that this weekend affords you “You can’t pour from an empty cup” comes to mind here. You can’t keep looking after everyone else if you’ve had no time to look after yourself.

· Plan when and how often you will communicate with your child(ren) over the weekend.

· Write notes or draw pictures whenever you’re missing them and share them with them when they get back. This becomes cathartic for you and sweet for them.

· The sun doesn’t have to dictate your wardrobe, wear what feels comfortable and allow yourself plenty of time to choose the right clothes for you.

· Your weight, wardrobe, body, or anything else about you does not have to be topics of conversation unless YOU want them to be.

And remember, ultimately, a bank holiday is just another weekend so try not to put too much pressure on it or on yourself.

If anything I have mentioned in this blog has resonated with you and you would like some support, please get in touch for a chat, I would love to work with you. You can contact me via the ‘contact me’ page on the website or just click the envelope below.

Feel free to follow me on my Instagram @jodiemccormack_counselling where I often talk about relationships with yourself and your loved ones and share tips on self-care.